


Watchman

by BlackKittens



Category: Big Hero 6 (2014)
Genre: Drunken Shenanigans, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-01
Updated: 2019-07-01
Packaged: 2020-06-02 09:39:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19438798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackKittens/pseuds/BlackKittens
Summary: Someone has to watch the pair while they're currently drunk and trying to doggy paddle in a fountain. Heathcliff isn't troubled by it, though.





	Watchman

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize in advance for the abrupt ending. This ran on longer than I wanted trying to figure out how to end it. Anyway, here's some Fredashi being idiots because I love drunken adventures.
> 
> (Also, now I really want to write about Heathcliff and Fred's parents. I have headcanons for them that I should really write sometime.)

Heathcliff has seen so much in his twenty-seven years as a butler for the Lee family that hardly anything fazes him anymore - if anything. Master Reginald and Madame Genevieve's top secret work over the years has extinguished much of his startle reflex. Not even the declaration that Master Frederick and his companions would unwittingly follow in their footsteps had thrown him off. He was almost certain he was immune to surprises.

And when it comes to Master Frederick in particular, well - it's difficult to be surprised by someone you've all but raised his entire life. Heathcliff wouldn't go as far as to call Master Frederick like a son to him - maybe more of a nephew, or a godson - but he had been one of his primary caretakers over the years, and he loves the young man like family. He knows Master Frederick's personality just as well as he knows Master Reginald and Madame Genevieve's.

And therefore, he knows it's just like Master Frederick to get drunk and go for a swim in the garden fountain in the middle of the night.

The fact his boyfriend, Tadashi Hamada, is equally as drunk and attempting to doggy paddle in the shallow water with him, is no more surprising either. While Mr. Hamada is a grounded young man with a greater deal of common sense than was gifted to Master Frederick at birth, he's still a college student; and college students will be college students, who like to indulge in alcohol now and again. As long as he is of age (and he is, Heathcliff had made sure), it's really none of his business what Mr. Hamada does.

Nevertheless, it is twelve forty-seven in the morning and although he is an adult now, Master Frederick remains Heathcliff's charge - especially in this intoxicated state, _especially_ while he's in water, no matter how shallow. Somebody sober has to watch out for him so he doesn't drown himself in the fountain by accident. And by extension, since Mr. Hamada is here, him as well.

Heathcliff doubts either of them had realized he'd turned on the garden lights and is standing a mere fifteen feet from the fountain, observing them. After all, they're currently trying to figure out how to doggy paddle in water that only goes up to their knees and elbows. He has no reason to inform them otherwise, so he doesn't.

It is amusing, though, Heathcliff has to admit. His upper lip twitches at their confusion and further attempts. On the surface, Master Frederick and Mr. Hamada don't appear much alike - one is boisterous and one is reserved, one is energetic and one is contemplative, one is imaginative and one is a scientific genius - but spend enough time around them as he has, and the similarities begin to show themselves. Both young men are cheerful, encouraging, helpful, creative, comic enthusiasts, and want to make the world a better place, be it through ground breaking inventions or dedicated charity work. And, of course, both completely lose their wits when they get drunk.

"I don't think it's gonna work, Fred," he hears Mr. Hamada slur, sitting up in the fountain. "I've looked at EVERY angle. Even when the water moves, I just scrape my hands. I think the pool is broken."

"No, it's not broken!" Master Frederick shrieks. "I swear, I was paddlin' like a chihuahua the other day! You know what I think? The sun did it. It evap- evap- evoper- It stole all the water for the air to drink during the day!"

Mr. Hamada purses his lips together. "You know what...I might have heard of that before. It's called conversation, isn't it?"

Master Frederick nods sagely. "Yup, that's the word. The sun's evil, man. What we need to do - uh - is fill the pool back up! With the HOSE! Come on, let's get the hose and fill it back up, then I'll show you how chihuahuas swim."

Heathcliff watches as the two attempt to navigate getting out of the fountain. Master Frederick throws one leg over the concrete before flopping face first on the grass. Mr. Hamada gets both legs over the edge before slipping down on his side next to him. They break out into drunken giggles together.

Sometimes, their other companions will get drunk with them. Usually, not here at the Lee residence, but at a bar or club. On those nights, it's Heathcliff's prerogative to get everybody home safely when Master Frederick makes the call, after which he puts Master Fredick to bed. When it's only the two of them, however, they often drink here, and cause all the mischief they can before exhaustion catches up and puts them to sleep on their own.

It's not surprising, but it is amusing.

"I can't feel my legs," Mr. Hamada says between giggles. "It bet it was conversation. The human body is one hundred and twenty percent water, did you know that?"

"Cooool," Master Frederick slurs. "I always wanted to be water. Can you help me up? My legs feel like water, too, man."

Heathcliff takes that as his cue. He doesn't intervene often in their antics, but this sounds like it requires assistance. Besides, it's late and he would like to go to bed himself sometime soon.

"Master Frederick," he says as he approaches them, "Mr. Hamada, I believe it's time to retire for the night. I'll escort you back to your room. I suppose you won't require a guest room prepared for you, Mr. Hamada?"

Master Frederick raises his chin with bright eyes. "Heathcliff! Where'd do you come from?"

Mr. Hamada, meanwhile, stares up at him in confusion. "Who are you?"

Heathcliff doesn't respond to either of them. Yes, he'll take them back to Master Frederick's room, he thinks as he helps his charge to his feet first, then his boyfriend. They normally spend the night together, regardless of whether they...do anything...or simply curl up together like sleepy puppies. In the morning, they'll both whine under the covers together in response to their hang overs a he brings them glasses of water and a light breakfast. This is essentially routine now. Nevertheless, it never hurts to ask.

On their feet, Master Frederick and Mr. Hamada grab onto each other to steady themselves, Master Frederick grabbing the side of Mr. Hamada's shirt in a tight grip and Mr. Hamada latching onto his shoulder. They sputter in laughter together.

"This is a fun date, Fred," Tadashi says as Heathcliff leads them towards the mansion by Master Frederick's free hand. "Why don't we go drinking more often? Once a month's too short."

"I don't know. Conversation, probably," Master Frederick replies in all seriousness, as if that makes any sense.

Heathcliff opens the deck doors. They'll drip water everywhere as they venture inside, but he can clean that up later.

"You'll have to change out of your clothing when we get to your room, Master Frederick and Mr. Hamada," he tells them. "You'll catch pneumonia if you sleep in those. Mr. Hamada, do you mind borrowing from Master Frederick's closet? It's all we have in your size, I'm afraid. I'll do laundry in the morning."

"Okay," Mr. Hamada giggles absently.

Heathcliff has a feeling he'd have giggled that to anything he said.

"Heathcliff, you're the best," Master Frederick grins, adjusting his arm so he's holding Mr. Hamada's waist properly. "You do laundry and get Tadashi in boyfriend shirts. Mom and Dad should give you a raise. I'll give you a raise!"

"Not necessary, but thank you, sir," Heathcliff tells him.

"Boyfriend shirt?" Mr. Hamada asks. "Why would I date a shirt and call it my boyfriend?"

"No, you're gonna wear MY shirt," Master Frederick corrects him. "It'll be great. You'll look great. I like boyfriend shirts. You should wear my Daisuke Danger 2021 shirt. Best live action adaptation ever. You'll be hot."

"Oh," Mr. Hamada nods. "Good. I don't want to date a shirt. I love you more than shirts."

"Bro, that's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me," Master Frederick drawls. "One of these days, I'm gonna ask you out, you know that?"

Heathcliff resists the urge to roll his eyes, though his upper lip twitches once more.

They are a sweet couple, he thinks. Sweeter when they're sober and have their wits about them, but he can't be annoyed when they're like this. Besides, it makes Master Frederick happy - Mr. Hamada makes him happy, even when they're whining over their hang overs in the morning - and that's all the really matters to him in the end.

He opens Master Frederick's bedroom door. Now for the hard part; getting them dressed in dry clothing without seeing anything he'd rather not see.

"We'll start with the clean underwear," he says, pushing ahead of them. "I hope I can trust you can put them on yourselves."


End file.
